Headline Hooks: Get Yours Here

nobody@vox.com(Sheridan Randolph) — Wed, 07 May 2008 18:20:24 -0400

In my last post I gave a working definition of a hook, and some examples of there use in winning headlines. So by now you should have no difficulty recognizing them on your strolls past the newstand, and on sales pages online. Hooks or paradoxes are not the only way to capture your prospect's interest in a headline, but it is tried and true, and very useful in competitive markets.

For example, the weight loss industry. This industry is evergreen and sophisticated. Ads have been around for a long time. Countless strategies and tactics have been invented, tried and tested. The government has even outlawed some of them. Ask your lawyer about the phrase 'melts fat'. Ironically, there was a time when that industry couldn't even exist. As being 'overweight' became unattractive (and as people, with a cheap and copious supply of food, became increasingly obese), a desire to be thin and beautiful was born. On a mass scale.

This mass desire was great enough to interest some bright marketer as being commercial, and broad enough to ultimately welcome a myriad of successfully competing products, as well as a host of unsuccessful attempts. But to go back to a moment to that first weightloss headline, which do you think would have been more successful: "Lost Doctor Discovers Tibetan Weight Loss Miracle Herb – Guaranteed to Take Off 4 Inches in 6 Weeks, or Double Your Money Back", or "Lose Weight"? Well, of course the latter headline would be far more effective in a virgin market, where the former would garner only guffaws of disbelief. In today's market, however, "Lose Weight" would be lucky to even get a "so what?" response. With an added piece of human interest, a hook, or a new mechanism, however...

Still with me? Good. Hopefully, you are asking what all this has to do with you. Your headline must take into account all we've discussed together. From the mass desire to the features of the product, from the big promise to the hook. And you've got the tools now to find all of those, except the last.

You are looking for pieces of human interest. Details that stretch the limits of believability. Something that happens in an exotic place. Something with shock value. Something that couldn't be, or shouldn't. If you are working for someone else, you have to get them to tell stories. About how the product came into being. What the factory worker's nickname for the product is. Why their lawyer discouraged them from offering the product or service, or why their accoutant tried to reject the discount. Your job is to ask questions, and to listen.

If you are selling yourself, or your own product, the hook may be in your personality. Or it may be anything described above. The process is the same. You must ask yourself the questions, and filter them through your sales process to reveal that priceless bit of human interest. Try to step out of your business. Interview people who have been with you through the process. It's more art than science here, so don't censor.

As you practice, as you learn to look for hooks in headlines, you will begin to gain an intuitive feel for what makes a good hook. If you want some homework, consider your story, and all the improbable turns you took in life to get where you are now. You'll be amazed at all the 'hooks' you find.

To Your Copywriting Mastery

Sheridan Randolph

P.S. I keep talking about leveraging our work here. We'll take a break from headlines; that post on leveraging is up next.

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"Boy Eats Own Head"

nobody@vox.com(Sheridan Randolph) — Tue, 06 May 2008 22:57:15 -0400

We are interested in knowing what people say. About us, about things that affect our lives, etc. When you put something in quotation, readership will go up. I can't recommend using quotations in all your headlines, but if you find it appropriate for some of them, enjoy the slight edge it gives you in generating interest. In this case, I am actually quoting an old tabloid headline. In my last post I promised we'd look at hooks. You'll find none better than those used in "yellow journalism". (Caught your eye with the quotes, didn't I?)

An effective hook is made by pairing conflicting elements. That is, we all have schema for viewing the world. Every input is interpreted within a context. When two elements not found in the same context are juxtaposed, it gives pause and arouses curiosity. Often, this is the basis of a joke. (See, you weren't wasting time watching Comedy Central. You were developing your copywriting skills!) It can also provide your headline the twist it needs to stand out from your competition.

Today's headline uses all the tricks described above. A few posts back we discussed the value of studying headlines on the newsrack. Cosmo and its ilk, financial, Good Houskeeping, and especially old Readers Digest. But none of these come close to The National Enquirer in its prime. It is the source of today's headline – so the quotes are actually appropriate. Of course, that could never happen – a boy eating his own head... right?

"A Little Mistake that Cost a Farmer $3,000 a Year". Another classic direct mail headline. A small cause set against a large consequence. For the market, farmers, who are as a rule diametrically opposed to waste, this hooks them right at the point of greatest mass desire.

"Liars! Liars! Liars!" This one from Gary Bencivenga. It is for a financial newsletter, and manages to hook with a single word, repeated. The financial newsletter industry is beset with offers that overpromise, and brokerage houses are notorious for giving bad advice. My father once lost a great deal of money when a young broker sold his position in one stock and bought a "hot" stock that my father told him explicitly not to buy. Do you think he would notice this headline? Of course, you can see what it is – an offer for more financial advice, and the sub head clarifies everything. How unexpected to see what's really on your mind when looking at these sort of offers. It is a very powerful hook, a bold move. I leave you to contemplate.

"How I Made a Fortune with a 'Fool Idea'". Everyone knows you have to be some kind of genius to get rich. Right? This headline promises instant gratification for something that we all believe should be very difficult. It doesn't fit. We are skeptical. But we want to believe...

Time for one more? "Burn Disease Out of Your Body". This one by Gene Schwartz. By now you should have it burned into your brain: message must match the market. As this post has hinted, the hook must be backed up by the copy. Just as we learned that the headline as a whole must be supported by the copy. Burning disease out is not how we usually think of healing. That is, burning is not often used in the context of healing. Also note, no words are wasted in the headline itself. The big promise, the one with mass appeal, related through a hook. All in six words. And it is fully explained in and directly supported by the copy that follows.

Finally, let's take a look at a 'working' headline. "Who else wants a proven 'SYSTEM' that turns raw ideas into solid businesses and solid businesses into raging cash machines in days and weeks instead of years". The quotes are part of the headline, the period is mine. This is by Ken McCarthy, a great copywriter, and well worth your study. This is for The System internet marketing seminar he's held since 1995 or so. Here's the link. Get on his mailing list there to catch the end of his email marketing campaign. Study his style, his email subjects, etc. It's a great resource for learning to write copy that connects.

This is a powerful headline, and yet manages to just avoid coming across as hype. 'Proven' is for all of us who have spent money on seminars or info-products that didn't deliever. 'System' refers to the name of the seminar, and works for the market that is a little more serious than the weekend get-rich-quick schemers. It helps qualify. 'Raw ideas' is a great phrase I intend to swipe, and starts a train of thought – quasi poetic – that tips my better judgement away from skepticism over toward my gullibility. A proven system to get me a raging cash machine? I'm hooked.

Best,

Sheridan Randolph

P.S. If you're having trouble finding your own hook, don't worry. Help is on the way tomorrow. Then we'll look at a few different types of headlines to have a few templates in our toolkit. And a bonus on how to leverage some of the writing skills I've given you (to give you more time). Writing the body copy is just around the corner!

P.P.S. Curious about the Bencivenga letter? It's copyright protected, so I can't send you a copy, but an updated version of the same letter is live online. Edited to keep up with current events. And with a new headline. See what you think... here.

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Copywriting Made Simple

Headline Hooks: Get Yours Here

"Boy Eats Own Head"